Day 12: he fuckin dumped me :(

	Alleyn is now online. Any messages you send him may not
	be secure. Do not enter any personal or credit card
	information into chat.
xXsarahXx:	hey
Alleyn:		Greetings.
xXsarahXx:	how r u?
Alleyn:		In reference to a human state of existence or
		that of my own race's?
Alleyn:		Of course, I use the term “race” loosely. We are
		more a collective of purely energy-based beings,
		living across more dimensions than the mere
		mortal mind can comprehend and existing in
		emotional states that could not even be
		documented by the greatest individuals of your
		society.
xXsarahXx:	lol
xXsarahXx:	i guess as a human?
Alleyn:		In that case, I would rate my current state as
		exceptional. It is the euphoria which my people
		enjoy every conscious moment. It would
		destroy a weaker mind such as yours.
xXsarahXx:	weaker mind?
xXsarahXx:	r u calling me dum or sumthin?
Alleyn:		I did not claim that, no; I simply stated the
		facts. Your emotional interpretation of them is
		outside of my control.
xXsarahXx:	ur a fuckin asshole
Alleyn:		That is literally incorrect, and so I assume it
		is meant as an insult. If that is the case, could
		you clarify which element of our conversation led
		to your negative reaction? It is something my
		people are interested in discovering more about.
		We wish to begin diplomatic relations with your
		betters. (Your message could not be delivered as
		xXsarahXx is currently offline. Any messages you
		send will be delivered to them when they sign
		in.)

	(XxSaRaHxX has come online.)
Alleyn:		I apologise for any unintended inferences that
		you took from our last exchange. I meant no
		offence and would regret any damage done to our
		relationship because of them.
XxSaRaHxX:	what?
Alleyn:		I apologise for the outcome of our last
		interaction.
XxSaRaHxX:	lol
XxSaRaHxX:	don’t worry
Alleyn:		I can’t help but worry. A lot rests on our
		relationship.
XxSaRaHxX:	relationship?
XxSaRaHxX:	i haven’t evem met u lol
Alleyn:		You are talking to me right now. Is that not
		meeting?
XxSaRaHxX:	lol
XxSaRaHxX:	online dosnt count
XxSaRaHxX:	you have to meet in like town or sumthin
Alleyn:		Unfortunately, that would be impossible. Is there
		no way that interactions through a digital medium
		can become meaningful?
XxSaRaHxX:	i hav 2 go
XxSaRaHxX:	chat tomorrow x
Alleyn:		I will wait until then and look forward to
		further communication with you. (Your message
		could not be delivered as XxSaRaHxX is currently
		offline. Any messages you send will be delivered
		to them when they sign in.)

	(XxSaRaHxX - luv u shaun ;) has come online)
XxSaRaHxX:	omg
XxSaRaHxX:	did u here?
Alleyn:		I am incapable of hearing in this form, though I
		believe that has already been explained to you.
XxSaRaHxX:	shaun axed me out
XxSaRaHxX:	i was like what?
XxSaRaHxX:	ur not serius
XxSaRaHxX:	and he was totely serius
Alleyn:		I’m not sure I fully understand the implications
		of your interaction, but you seem pleased by it.
		Could you clarify?
XxSaRaHxX:	lol
XxSaRaHxX:	he axed me out!
XxSaRaHxX:	we r dating now. hes takin me 2 the cinems next
		weekend
Alleyn:		Could you describe the interaction to me? You
		must forgive me, but this sounds similar to our
		own courting ritual and I would like to observe
		its outcome.
XxSaRaHxX:	what?
XxSaRaHxX:	u fuckin perv
XxSaRaHxX:	im not lettin u watch
Alleyn:		I did not mean to cause offence. I simply believe
		it would be educational for me to observe. Our
		species would gain a significant amount of
		insight from the courting interactions between
		members of your species and it may help us avoid
		embarrassing mistakes should our emissaries
		contact you officially. It has often been
		surprising how simple acts can be misinterpreted
		as improper due to the societal norms of a
		culture or species, and we wish to avoid that at
		all costs.
XxSaRaHxX:	wtf?
Alleyn:		I did not mean to cause offence. It would be
		educational for me and my species and we feel
		that asking to observe situations like this is
		polite; we do not want to infringe on personal
		privacy.
XxSaRaHxX:	ur fukcin crazy
Alleyn:		I apologise. I will not make the request again.
		(Your message could not be delivered as	XxSaRaHxX
		is currently offline. Any messages you send will
		be delivered to them when they sign in.)

	(sarah - life is nothin but pain an cruelty :’( has come
	online.)
sarah:		fuk
Alleyn:		Greetings.
sarah:		i totely fukd it up
Alleyn:		With regards to your interactions with Shaun?
sarah:		yeh
Alleyn:		Could you detail the events?
sarah:		it was fuckin stupid
sarah:		we wer at the cinema and we met my frirnd
		charlotte
sarah:		who i reallylike but i thouht she wanted 2 go tou
		wif shaun
sarah:		and he was bein real nice 2 her
sarah:		and i just yelled at her 2 get lost
sarah:		and he thouht i was a totel freak
sarah:		and chatlotte wont text me bak or tak 2 me
sarah:		its all jst fuckin shit
sarah:		i have fucked evethin up
Alleyn:		Others before me have collected information on
		events similar to these. The statistical
		likelihood that you and Shaun will begin
		conversing again is almost fifteen to one.
sarah:		rely?
Alleyn:		Really. I would not distort statistics like that.
		It is considered perverted to do so where I am
		from.
sarah:		i dont se why he wud
Alleyn:		The explanation is rather simple. Both of you are
		going through a major growth stage for your
		species and your underdeveloped brains are faced
		with new chemical reactions for which they are
		completely unprepared. We have gathered enough
		information on this process to reliably inform
		you that your brain and body will adapt in
		roughly eight years, after which you will have
		reached adulthood, at which point you should be
		able to handle said chemical reactions much more
		easily and retain a more positive state of mind,
		though they still have their effects. We have
		noticed similar occurrences in our own species
		but they appear to have been reduced through the
		generations.
Alleyn:		Are you still there? I’d like to discuss the
		exact interactions with Shaun more.
sarah:		underdeveloped?
sarah:		ur a fuckin prick
Alleyn:		Once again, I apologise if I’ve caused any
		offence. (Your message could not be delivered as
		sarah is currently offline. Any messages you send
		will be delivered to them when they sign in.)

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